


YOUR TURN

by kialarry_1645 (orphan_account)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Or so tthey thought, PLEASE DONT BE MAD AT THE END, Sad Ending, Sad Harry, Sad Louis, Sad everyone, Smut, angst with sad endding, depressed, harry is a dumb bitch, just a little, they keep arguing abt whos top and bottom, this is lame i wrote it in 8th grade, too much pain i cri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:09:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21894172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/kialarry_1645
Summary: Harry never knew. Louis never told him.ORLouis and Harry break up for a reason that may or may not have been true.Also, Louis tops, and no Harry does not agree.
Relationships: Harry Styles & Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne & Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne/Original Female Character(s), Perrie Edwards/Zayn Malik
Kudos: 5





	YOUR TURN

**Author's Note:**

> I almost forgot that I had written this. It's crazy old.  
> Hope you like it!

Harry could be nothing but thankful that he got a man like Louis. His back was arched and his head was tilted backwards as Louis' tongue explored his insides and he could just be thankful.

  


Louis always took care of him. Always.

They've been together for five long years and the fact that it was their anniversary made it all the more special.

Harry was aware of how much Louis loved him, and he was reminded of it even more as Louis was pounding into him.

"Ah! Haz you feel so g-good ah!"

"Harder Lou, unghhhhhhgh!"

A repetition of such words and a lot more was reason why both of them came together.

Harry was bigger, but it was nothing Louis couldn't handle. Louis had been much stronger.

As they finished, Louis collapsed on Harry after pulling out. His breathing was more rugged than that of Harry and Louis just stayed there nuzzling into Harry's neck.

That was quite unusual of him, though. Louis would always spoon Harry.

This was new but Harry didn't mind.

"Babe? You seem tired." , Harry stated.

"Hmm..... Hold me Hazza..." , Louis said sleepily.

Harry smiled fondly at his small boyfriend and held him tight. "Happy Anniversary Boo", he said but Louis was in deep sleep already.

He was so in love with this blue eyed angel.

*************

"Wake up boo." Harry was sitting on top of Louis, face extremely close to his and lips ghosting over Louis'.

Louis slowly opened his eyes and seeing Harry first thing in the morning was the best thing that could ever happen to him. They kissed for about ten minutes.

"Ew your mouth tastes like shit."Harry snickered disgusted by Louis' morning breath.

"That's because I ate you out last night!" Louis laughed.

"Way to turn me off Tomlinson. You're not getting head anymore. "

"Ruuuuude", Louis pouted as Harry left the room in the sassiest way to make breakfast.

Harry and Louis spent the whole day together. They went to the beach and also did some shopping (only because Harry insisted. Louis hates shopping.) After dinner, they returned home determined to do things as if they were doing after a long time. They were desperate for each other even after 5 years of being together.

Louis fidgeted with the keys and the lock as he made out with Harry at the same time.

The door was pushed open and as they closed it behind them Harry was being pushed to the wall.

Louis left little red bruises as he nipped at Harry's neck, which he was sure would turn purple in the morning.

In no time they were on the bed as Louis straddled his lover.

He immediately flipped them over as they continued to grind against each other still fully clothed, the roughness of their jeans being rubbed on their hard-ons giving them a little relief.

Soon enough their clothes were off and they continued kissing and touching one another.

"Haz? Can I - you know, ask for something? Please." Louis said looking into the green orbs.

"Yeah babe. Anything." Harry said rather breathlessly.

"I want you.....inside me. I mean, I want you to kinda... Top?" Harry was astonished. Louis Tomlinson just requested to bottom.

Now that's new. Louis always took control. Harry has never topped once in his 5 years with Lou. Ever.

"Woah... Yeah of course Lou -wow-that's -wow. ", Harry said still a little shook.

Harry fingered Louis with some lube, and could hear the tempting moans of 'uh uh uh' from him.

Louis was nervous, Harry could tell.

"You sure 'bout this babe?"

"Yes. Harry p-please....fuck me... I need you!"

Without another word Harry entered Louis, slowly moving in and waiting for his Lou to adjust. He began to move, not too fast.

"Yea-ah Haz... You're so big... Ungh. Feel so good."

That night Louis had to be spooned by Harry again.

He didn't know why they switched roles like that, but he kind of enjoyed it.

****

It had been 2 months since Louis' first time as a bottom and he hadn't topped yet. He had become the small spoon too!

Harry loved it and so did Louis. Whenever Harry would ask why Louis changed his style, he would simply say:

'It's your turn now. You'll always hold me. Right, Harry? '

Harry was happy. He would be happy either way. It was being with Lou that mattered to him the most. Louis was becoming more of a Twinkie, as Harry called it, day by day. It was a nice change though.

One night Louis came very late from work. It usually ended around 5 p.m., but Louis came back around 9p.m. Harry didn't mind, but Louis was never this late.

"Why so late Lou?"

"Some overtime at the bank Haz, it's nothing."

Louis looked so tired, like he'd been doing some physical work.

And that was not the last time Louis came home late and tired.

*******

Both lay naked on the bed as Louis made random shapes on Harry's torso with his fingers.

Harry was in deep thought looking intently at the ceiling.

"Watchya thinking Haz?"

Harry thought for a bit before he spoke.

"Just that... Things have changed you know.... And it all happened so quickly. I mean... It's nice, but ..."

"But what Hazza?"

"Babe, I know I should have trust in us and I wouldn't dare to doubt your faithfulness, but are happy with us? Is there something bothering you?"

Harry straight up wanted to ask Louis if he's been cheating. Louis goes off for many hours at night, without any explanation.

Louis did not reply. He was hoping Harry wouldn't notice the changes, but he was wrong. He nervously shifted and sighed uncomfortably.

Harry did not expect that. Why wasn't Louis saying anything at all? He felt a pit in his stomach when he thought, what if Louis was cheating on him?

Harry lifted his head and looked at Louis whose eyes were teary now.

"Louis?"

"'m sorry Haz." Louis' voice cracked as he said so.

"Louis why are you - Lou is there... Someone else? ", Harry didn't know it but he was already crying.

"I'm sorry!" Louis sat up and covered his face as he began to weep.

It was like Harry's world had crumpled right then.

"YOU FUCKING BASTARD! YOU WERE CHEATING ON ME ALL THIS WHILE!? ", Harry screamed. Why would Louis do such a thing!

Harry got up and got dressed immediately. He headed to the kitchen and opened a bottle of vodka. He filled a glass and sat himself on the kitchen stool, staring into empty space.

He couldn't deal with it anymore. He lost Louis. After an hour or so, Harry heard Louis' small voice.

"Harry.... I-I -"

"I don't want to hear it Lou. Please leave the house. "

"What!?" Louis looked shocked.

"You heard me. I want you to leave. Now. Go live with your new lover, you cheat. "

"Haz -"

"Don't call me that. Who is the guy anyway? Is it Liam? Or is it that Niall bloke from the office? "

Louis wanted to cry. He didn't want things to go this way, but he didn't have a choice. God had been so cruel sometimes.

"Liam." Louis said without any emotion.

"Leave. Please. ", Harry said looking at his vodka.

Louis packed his bag and was about to leave when Harry stopped him.

"Wait!" Harry walked up to him. He pulled out the promise ring Louis had given him 3 years ago and placed it in Louis' hand.

"Next time you give it to a person, make sure you mean the promise you make. Goodbye. "

"Okay..." Louis said quietly, a tear slipping down his cheek.

Louis left, for good this time. Harry didn't sleep that night and only cried. What did he do to deserve this? Wasn't he good enough for Louis?

Louis was no better. He felt like trash after what he did to Harry. He hated himself even more now.

He walked in the cold night to that one person he knew would always be there for him.

He knocked the door thrice, before it opened.

"Lou?"

**************

3 Months later.

It had been 3 months. 3 long months since Harry spoke to Louis.

There were times when Harry felt like killing himself and tried calling Louis, but he never picked up. It was sad how Louis didn't want to mend their relationship. Harry would have considered giving Louis another chance, but it looked like Louis didn't want anything to do with him anymore.

Sometimes Harry felt the urge to cut, but he didn't want to stoop so low and hurt himself for someone who didn't care at all.

Zayn and Nick were two people who helped him a lot. Especially Zayn. Louis was the one who introduced them. Louis and Zayn were best buddies. But he and Louis apparently were not talking anymore.

Harry wasn't that close to Zayn, but over the past few months Zayn came to visit a lot and Harry was happy that at least someone cared. He'd never really gone out and met up with anyone after Louis. Heck he didn't even go to Zayn it Nick's houses!

He stayed at home working on his book and after Louis he lost motivation too.

He couldn't take it for long. He needed to speak to Louis at least one last time. He wanted to know why he didn't want Harry back. He needed closure.

He'd do anything to speak to him one last time.

Harry went through Louis' old phone book searching for Liam's contact.

"Found it! "He cheered to himself and quickly dialed the number unsure if it was okay to call them like that.

"Hello?"

"Um... Hey Liam, I'm Harry Styles"

"Harry Styles? Wait I know that name. ", so Louis never mentioned him at all. Wonderful.

"Yeah I am... Louis' ex."

"Louis Tomlinson? You mean Tommo!? Yeah!! I remember now. So tell me Harry. How can I help you?"

That was weird.

"Uhh... I was hoping I could speak to him you know. I know it's weird for you to let me, but I just need to-"

"Wait up Harry. Louis isn't here. He left the office three months ago. "

What does that have to do with anything? Wait, Louis left his job?

"Oh ...um so isn't he at your place. I mean you guys live together, don't you? "

"What? Why would we live together Harry! "He laughed.

"Because he's your boyfriend?"

"What!? No way! Louis is like a brother to me. Or was. Don't know where the lad is now. "

"WHAT?"

"Yeah... I have had a wife for 6 years now. Have a kid too. "

"Oh. Um and you and Louis never had anything? "

"No! God no! That would be incest and kind of gay, which I'm not. "

"Oh I'm so sorry I had a misunderstanding.... Catchya later? "

"Sure mate. Goodbye. "

And that's it. Harry was shaking like a leaf. Louis never dated Liam. Liam wasn't even gay! Did Louis lie to him? Why would he? This was all so crazy!

He needed to get to Zayn immediately. He drove to his house with the GPS on his phone in one hand and the steering wheel in the other , now for the first time for the soul purpose of finding out where on earth Louis was, who was he with and why he lied.

He pulled over at Zayn's place and ran literally ran out of the car maybe for getting to even lock it.

He kept banging in the door which was opened by Perrie, Zayn's girlfriend.

"H-Harry? What's the matter you look so blue!? ", she said pulling him in.

"Where is Zayn? I need to talk to him right now. It's important. "

"Sit down he's inside the room. I'll go call him. "

She went in and Harry waited nervously, so much was going through his mind now.

He could here whispers from inside. Perrie was probably telling Zayn to come out soon and talk to him.

Zayn came into the hall, with a pale face. It was very cold.

"What's the matter Harry?"

"Zayn - its Lou he lied to me! He told me he was with Liam. I found Liam, Zayn. He told he didn't know where Louis was. And that they never dated. He has been married for six years Zayn! ", harry rambled running out of breath eventually.

"Louis' been married for 6 years!?"

Harry rolled his eyes, "No Zayn. Liam. He's been married-"

Harry quickly covered his face with his large hands trying not to cry.

"Relax Harry... Maybe it was a fling and then Louis left and moved on. He could be with someone else. Oh-and what if it's a different Liam?"

"It can't be Zayn... I knew all of his friends. I knew-"

"You didn't know he was cheating on you, did you?"

"But Zayn -"

"Harry. Sometimes people hide things from their loved ones because they are scared to hurt them. And maybe Louis wanted to be hated for what he did, than to be loved for something he didn't do. "

"What do you mean Zayn?"

"Harry... Maybe he was feeling guilty for something he couldn't control. So he let you go instead. "

"Okay you're making zero sense right now." Harry said more confused than he already was.

They sat in silence for a while, until Harry heard a whimper from one of the rooms.

Was Perrie crying? Did she hear them?

"I think Perrie heard you she's crying inside." Harry said.

"Y-yeah I guess. That's her. "

"Of course it is. Go on call her here she doesn't have to feel bad. "

Zayn was a little nervous and Harry noticed.

"Yeah, no. She'll be fine. "

"Zayn. ", Harry warned, "Go talk to her or I will."

"Uh, yeah okay I'll check on her..." Zayn headed towards the room.

Harry sat there looking around. The whimpering had stopped. After a while the door of the second room opened.

"Perrie? When did you go in there? "

"You guys were talking so I didn't want to disturb you. You didn't notice when I did. "

"But, who was whimpering then? And Zayn is in that bedroom supposedly comforting you."

Perrie froze.

Harry found this so odd. What was going on in this house?

He walked towards the room where Zayn was.

"Harry I don't think you should go in there!" Perrie lunged in front of him to block his way.

"Why? Who's in there? "

"Harry please. You shouldn't go in there. "

"You can tell me Perrie. I'm your friend too. You guys helped me so much. Just tell me. ", Harry asked innocently.

Perrie shuddered at his words. She felt so guilty for hiding. Harry deserved to know this.

"Go in." she said, wiping a few tears. What? Are you sure? I mean, you could just tell me who it is and I won't go in."

Perrie sighed and looked into Harry's eyes. It was heart-breaking to see so much pain in them.

"No Harry. You need to go in there. You might want to. "

Harry nodded eager to find out.

He twisted the door knob, opening it slowly and what he saw was terrifying.

He saw Louis.

His Louis, on the bed crying his eyes out and Zayn was holding. Harry let out a gasp.

It couldn't be!

Both Louis and Zayn were startled when the saw Harry.

"Perrie! Why did you get him in here?!" Zayn exclaimed.

Louis and Harry's eyes were locked for a long time now. It was all so crazy. Louis was in Zayn's house all these months?

"So what now? You went to Zayn after your Liam didn't take you in? "

Louis did not reply. The tension was all too thick.

So Harry thought his assumption was right.

"Actually, I don't blame him for not taking you. No one would ever love you. You're horrible. I don't know why Zayn did even after knowing the shit you've done to Me.", Harry didn't want to say those words. He loved Louis more than anyone else, but seeing him after six months, Harry felt the urge to hurt him and make him feel guilty.

Louis felt small. No one would ever love him. That's what Harry said. The Harry who loved him more than anything in the world.

"You motherfuck-"

"ENOUGH! It was Zayn's turn to get angry now.

"Fuck Harry! You don't know shit about what Louis has been going through! "

"Are you seriously taking his side!?"

"Louis didn't cheat on you Harry. I still don't know why he hid this from you-"

Louis cut him off. "Zayn. No. You can't please. ", he whimpered.

"I can't lie to him anymore, Louis. You know that. He deserves to know. ", Zayn reasoned.

"Deserves to know what? What are you guys talking about? ", Harry asked, eyebrows knitted together.

"Zay-", Louis tried to stop him, but Zayn continued.

"Louis has Acute Myeloid Leukemia."

Zayn stated. He tried his best not to break in front of Harry.

Harry's heart almost stopped beating. Louis couldn't make eye contact anymore so he just covered his face.

Harry fell on his knees immediately. It was making so much sense now.

He was always so tired. Harry wanted to kill himself for never noticing or even caring.

Louis had to go through this all alone.

It was now that he noticed how thin Louis had become. He was so pale. And his hair, it wasn't as voluminous as before. Louis was fading.

"L-Lou y-you never... Told me. Why Lou? ", Harry was ashamed of himself.

Louis just cried.

Zayn got up. "You both need to sort things out. Perrie and I will leave you two for the night. I'm sorry Harry, you were supposed to know. Not like this. "

  


"If I hadn't come today. I would never have found out. ", Harry said, more to himself.

Zayn apologized once more leaving the two boys alone.

"If I wouldn't have come ... I would never have known." Harry made himself louder looking at anything but Louis.

"Hazza... ", Louis whispered out and Harry realized how much he was dying on the inside to listen to his boy's voice again.

"Lou", he whimpered, finally looking at Louis who looked as broken as Harry did.

As soon as Harry noticed Louis' tears trailing down his face, he quickly wiped his own and ran towards the smaller man.

Harry pulled Louis into his arms and now Louis was sobbing into Harry's chest, making it wet.

"Y-you d-don't kn-know how much I missed you! This is my entire fault!" Louis wailed out.

"Shh Baby", Harry soothed, "If anything, it's my fault for thinking of something which you'd never do. It's my fault I didn't trust you. Is that why you used to get home late? "

"Mhm, chemo." Louis voiced as Harry patted his back.

"How's that working out, hm? I'm assuming you're recovering?" Harry gave him a faint smile.

Louis frowned, before beginning to sob once again.

"No-no... I... The doctor said that I'm too weak Hazza." Harry stiffened. "I don't have much time baby... ", Louis gave him a sad smile and tried to pull Harry back to hug him.

Harry pushed back, frozen to his spot. "Did you know that? D-did you know that before you left?"

"It's Myeloid Leukemia, Haz- you know there's one chance in a hundred." Louis stated and once again Harry was fuming.

"Then why the fuck didn't you tell me!? What we're you thinking!??! Didn't you want me to be with you!? What the fuck-", he was cut off by Louis' soft voice.

"I thought you - you shouldn't get too attached so it won't hurt when I go so -"

"So you thought you'd make me hate you! THAT IS MY DECISION TO MAKE.", the younger boy yelled.

"But I guess your stupid plan failed." Harry said and Louis looked up at him in confusion.

"I could never hate you. I tried very hard and ended up leaving that small space on the right side of our bed for you. I ended up crying because I missed you. I could never un-love you." Louis stared at him in awe. Harry was a sobbing mess and now it was his turn to bury his face into Louis' neck.

Louis stared ahead not knowing what to think.

  


"You could have t-told me, Lou...you were here all by y-yourself, we wasted so much t-time."

Harry pulled him close, as close as one can, grabbing him gently, making sure not to hurt Louis'. He kissed the smaller boy like he'd never be able to do it again and they cried, shivering in each other's arms.

"H-h-", Harry pulled away trying to speak but Louis pulled him back kissing him with more passion. Harry held his string grip and stopped their kissing by holding Louis' face in his hands and his green eyes peering into the dullness of Louis' blue ones.

"How much time?" he asked straight forward.

  


"Very little. Too little for your liking. I'll collapse anytime in the coming days and they'll put me on ventilators until my heart tires out." Louis said emotionless, not realizing what effects his words could have had on Harry. A tear drop trailed down his right cheek as he looked at his diminishing boyfriend.

"I love you. Always." Louis whispered.

That night they didn't have sex although Louis wanted too, Harry just held him tightly in his arms as they cuddled to sleep.

Louis had moved back to their flat noticing how Harry hadn't changed a single thing. Louis' clothes were the only things missing.

Their photo frame from their 3rd date still lay on the side table in the living room. The house was messy the way Louis liked it. Harry used to scold him for being too messy and since Louis had left his mess was Harry's only way to breathe.

That week was what Louis could describe as the best days spent with Harry. They didn't do anything new, but just being with him after so long made it special.

They both let in bed naked and Louis was caressing Harry's soft hair.

"That's why I stopped topping."

"What?"

"I stopped topping because chemotherapy made me feel tired. So don't think your some great dude at topping. I'm still Tommo the Top."

"No.", Harry shook his head. "You're Bottomlinson."

Louis collapsed two days later.

He was hospitalized immediately and he was lucky to stabilize for some time so Harry could see him.

Harry barged into his hospital room with bloodshot eyes and disheveled hair.

"You look like shit." Louis said, tiredness leaking out of his voice.

Harry lay next to Louis in the little amount of space he had, not caring if the nurse was going to be a bitch about it.

He took Louis' hand and intertwined it with his own and lay there, not daring to speak.

"Hazza

"Hazza...talk to me"

"Don't leave me!" Harry rushed out.

"I'll always be with you. I'll always be in your heart."

"Bu-bullshi-it."

Louis smiled to himself in content.

"Find someone nice or I'll have to make my ghost do it."

"Don't Say that ..." Harry nuzzled into Louis.

"Oh and one more thing." Louis pulled out his promise ring with shivering weak hands and slipped it onto Harry's finger.

"When I'm gone take your ring that you gave me when I left and put in my finger. That we'll always be connected. Harry scrunched up his face only to break into tears.

  


"Don't cry, love. There's one more thing." Harry looked at Louis, waiting for him to speak.

"If anyone asks, tell them I topped. Always. Okay?" Harry couldn't help but give a pained smile to his lover. 

"Never."

Louis made the little hedgehog face that Harry could never resist. He closed his eyes and held Louis close.

"Okay fine, I will. But only if you stay. That way you can, you know, check if I'm- Lou?" Harry stopped when he heard the E.C.G machine give faint and long beep.

"Lou! LOUIS NO! NO!" He screamed making the doctor and nurses barge in.

  


  


Louis was gone.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry for doing this  
> I think I cried  
> I LOVE them too much.
> 
> I'm AWARE of how badly this is written, I was young and this is probably one of my worst stories. You can hate on it all you want.
> 
> love,  
> BB


End file.
